Hey Nick, Happy Birthday.

You're ten, and still annoying but I'm still stuck with you for life. It's okay I'll get used to it.

I know Dad wanted to get you a new toy, he always does, doesn't he, when he does come back to see us at all, to ask us the same old questions, the answers to which he'd have forgotten the next time he comes back.

And then I know Mom would get mad, because she thinks Dad's trying to buy you over to him. Not saying there's no truth in that. You want that toy, but seeing Mom so mad, you decide maybe you don't want it so bad anymore.

I'm sorry Nick, I didn't mean for it to turn out this way on your birthday, we'll still go out and watch Up and forget that I'm supposed to study. But it'll be deja vu for a long time, brother.

Because he spoiled it all, and he's making half-hearted attempts to get it back. And she doesn't make it any easier.

But we don't need, and don't want, anyone to fix it for us.

Happy tenth, Nick.

Teacher's Day Plans

I may do up a chocolate fudge and a peanut butter fudge! Or a checkerboard cake. I already got myself a candy thermometer for the fudge!

Oh crap.

Everyone's so nice to me but I think I haven't been nice to people lately! Like I know I'm not good with anger management, but I'm trying my bestest!

I'm sorry! I feel like a total failure though I know I shouldn't think that way, it's just that everything I do turns out less than what I expected, and I was kinda depressed that I always have to try twice as hard as people to get something right. Or many times I screw something up and others suffer for it.

But I guess Mr. Lim's right. I should be coming out of it all praising God. And I know I have to keep fighting, because if I do, then even if I still am the underachiever I am, I woulda done better than if I give up now.

to vjsg0910 (:

I think it'll take a bit more than a push to jump start training again and I think most of us have gone abit...old.

But hang in there! THere'll be sprinting, there'll be long runs, but we'll get through it. Be brave (: I'm scared of sprints, but I like to remind myself that I had to do sprints last year and I didn't die.

Yesterday I was talking to my x-country friend and cross teacher was with us and she was ,"So are you joining us?"

I said I don't think I can make the commitment, I wouldn't quit what I'm doing now and even if I never make the first team I'll stick to it.

And she said "You'll have more future in cross."

Haha so she was telling me I have no future here? (: (I jest, no offence!)

But that's not the point, to me I know this team is worth it and I don't care if people laugh at me for stubbornly sticking to the team, it doesn't matter if they say I was never cut out for this game, I believe in hard work and finishing what I start.

I only have less than a year left with you all, anyway. It's a short time, I want it to count (:

Tired

You owe us this much, bastard.

Or at least, you owe my mom this much.

Don't tell me you don't have money, you earn enough to support a stranger woman and her stranger son.

You love me. You love me? You don't even tell me what's going on. What am I to you, stupid? I wasn't born yesterday. (sure, but tell my sister, she is the smarter one after all.)

We just want a nice flat the block just beside where we used to stay. It's not condo, let alone a house where we now are.

You're forcing us to stay here. I think you just making fun of my mom, and better yet, you do it behind my back while you kiss my ignorant ass.

And you want us to stay cause this house has got...sentimental value. Yeah it smells like late Grandpa when he stayed here. But I have as much sentiment for grandpa and this house as you do for my mother and this family.

Grandpa did tell you to be a good man while he was still here, you know, but I didn't see you care as much about him back then.

Do you hate me? I don't think you want me anymore. You just selfish, a chauvanistic pig.

Mom, I wish you didn't have to worry or sleep on things. I want to "think about it" for you, but alas, it is not mine to decide.

But I have my own to worry about. I have a title to defend, I have exams to handle, it's not the whole world on my shoulders, but it sure feels heavy.

You're mad at me for being nice to him. But, he is my dad, he likes to say he loves me, but who doesn't like to hear that?

It's Good Friday!

I don't know if you've noticed, but it always rains with thunder on Good Friday.

I always believed (and still do) that God sends the rain on this day. When I was little I thought God could be crying on this Good Friday, the rain is His tears and the thunder his anger towards our disobedience.

I know God doesn't literally cry, but I think the rain and overcast weather is always a good reminder for me on this day.

I'm making a cinnamon roll lamb. It's supposed to look like this.

[img]http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p244/robin_n_sylvia/Easter%20fun/Untitled-9.jpg[/img]

Soccer Camp!

I earned my stripes.

Seriously, I feel so so happy. I worked my arse off for this just like the rest of the team, and I knew then that I wasn't a liability to the team, as slow as I am to learn. I tried my very bestest and I made progress and learnt alot! And I'm glad to know that I didn't let my team, coach or myself down.

Hope I continue like this. It was a great camp, and I came out learning so much.

Oh I made really low fat chewy oatmeal raisin cookies. They were pretty awesome and as good as any other cookie I've made. Nomnom. I like oatmeal raisin.